So, it’s the weekend… not right now it’s not but just imagine it is. You meet up with your friends for Brunch (that’s breakfast and lunch combined people, or as my mother would call it, “notions”). Brunch turns into Drunch (that’s drunken lunch people or as my mother would cal it, ” a holy disgrace at this hour of the day”) and before you know it you’re taking a taxi home. But, it’s only 4pm. Great, still time for a nap before you prep for the night ahead.
Onwards and upwards it’s another taxi into town for a night of civilised socialising. Civilised or not the end of the night arrives and you will indeed need a another taxi home. That’s 3 taxis in just one day, unless you’re lucky enough to have a very kind significant other who doesn’t part-take in weekend mayhem like you and drives you everywhere. If they are your significant other, then it’s unlikely.
Chances are you’ve met every type of taxi driver over the course of your adult life. The more I took taxis the more I observed similarities. I began to categorise every taxi driver I ever met. Very few defy the below list.
The Busy One
“If ya wouldn’t mind just figuring that out outside”, he says as you and your friend group are forced out to gale force wind and rain at the top of the street not your original destination, because ya know, it’s handier (for who?) and instead of everyone paying their own portion of the taxi fare in a rushed flurry one person pays total and everyone else “owes them a drink” for the rest of the night. This taxi driver ain’t got no time for that or this or anything really he’s just always in a hurry.
The Quiet One
Nothing, not a hello, not a goodbye noting. And it’s not because he can’t speak the same language as you it’s because he just couldn’t be bothered. Sure look, isn’t it very continental altogether?!
The One Who’s Great Craic
This lad is mad. He’s absolutely great craic. He so badly wants to join the party that he’s made his own taxi a party mobile. Blue LED lights. Unnecessary flat screens in the back of each seat. Super sound system blaring SPIN SouthWest. Sure why would ya leave at all when ya can just stay here and have the craic!?
The Cover Up
“Hiya, would ya mind popping the booth, I just have a suitca….”, “NO…I mean , ah no don’t go near the booth just shove it in the back seat there it’ll be grand. And if you hear any noises or anything odd from the back of the car not to worry, I’ve to bring it for pre-NCT it needs new bushens and that’s why it sounds like there’s a person in the booth…”
Ya, maybe I shouldn’t have flagged this one down…
The Sound One
Here’s your all time favourite. Happy to talk about the good/bad weather, what time he’s on until, if he always works weekends/nights, knows someone in your family or is distantly related to your and after chat even gives you a few bob off the fair.
Next time you take a taxi, think of this post and see if they fit into the category. Share your story with The MOD’s Blog.
Thanks for reading.